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By openjar, December 30, 2010 9:42 am

What’s a Miracle?
A couple weeks ago, a dear friend of mine raised the question, “what’s a miracle?” Honestly, I’d still thought about miracles the same way I did as a child –something happens that defies physics because “God made it happen.” A definition I now found wholly unsatisfying, and even a bit silly. After some contemplation, I decided that a miracle is (to me, at least) any experience  that we perceive as evidence of the Divine. I might also say it’s any direct experience of Divinity.

My friend had also asked everyone who was gathering with him on the winter solstice last week to share a story of a miracle they’d experienced. This is the one I chose to share, and some of the insights into it that I’ve just recently received. It is to me, the more direct experience I’ve ever had with the Divine.

My Archangel Rafael Story
It was November of last year (2009) and I’d just gotten home from somewhere, I don’t recall. As I stopped the car, I suddenly got the urge to meditate for a little while, and connect with Spirit. Right there, right then, in a car parked in a dark garage.

I had only just begun studying mediumship (the act of connecting with spirits in other realms) that September, so it was all still very new to me. I went through the process of raising my energy levels and such, as I’d learned to do in my mediumship classes. What I felt was a green light fall around me, and the presence of Archangel Rafael. I’d never consciously felt an Archangel before so I had no clue how I knew who it was that I felt but it was absolutely crystal clear to me that Archangel Rafael was with me.

I felt him gradually draw nearer to me, until he was superimposed over my own energy (as spirits typically do when practising mediumship). What loving, calm, healing energy! Then he pulled my hands up so that I held them in front of me, palms open and positioned to receive something. In them he placed a huge, glimmering emerald the size of a tennis ball.

For a few minutes, I just sat there feeling the phenomenal power of the gift he was giving me. Then he slowly began drawing my hands towards my heart. He stopped when the emerald reached the threshold of my heart, giving me the choice whether or not I wanted to place it in there. Today, I have a better appreciation for the importance of making deliberate choices about anything that fundamentally changes us, but at the time it perplexed me a little. “Why would he stop? Could there really be any uncertainty about where this emerald ought to go?!” Anyhow, without hesitation, I brought my hands to my chest, and the emerald to my heart.

What I felt at that moment can only be described as “mind blowing.” Such light radiated from the emerald, it was like a green supernova going off in my chest! Words came to me, as if from some place within me far, far more knowing than anything I normally experience, “I am Rafael.” For that moment, I was Rafael without any distinction between us. The joy was so powerful it was incomprehensible to me. I couldn’t sustain it. After just a few seconds I pulled back and he was suddenly some small distance away. He stayed with me for a while, while I took in what happened. Even now, when I speak about what it felt like, my voice trembles a little and I feel tears prickling in my eyes.

“Uh… what the heck just happened…?”
As I sat there, I felt so tremendously honoured. But I had to ask what just happened, and why. The only answer I got was that I needed the experience to know how valued and admired I am by Spirit. Rafael wanted to honour me, so that I would see for myself that I deserved it. Of course, everyone is so valued, loved, and deserving. So while I gratefully accepted the assistance in valuing and appreciating myself, the question still persisted. Why did that specific experience happen to me, specifically?

It’s a question that’s come to mind on repeated occasions ever since.

A Satisfying Answer
My question was only just answered early this morning, as I lie awake in bed unable to sleep. Well actually the first part of the answer came to me a few days ago, but the rest sunk in about an hour ago.

First, I had an insight the other day into what I am. Some people may be angels, faeries, or other beautiful, sublime beings here in human form for one or more lifetimes. I am simply Heart Chakra energy. That is what I am. (lol! A heart chakra with an ego and all the weaknesses I need to have a full, rich, and rewarding human experience, but a heart chakra nonetheless.) I’m still trying to wrap my head around what that means, exactly, but I think I understand it well enough for now.

So that answers my question, “Why me, specifically?”

Second, the emerald I received awakened in me an awareness of the energy that I am. It also makes it easier for me to connect with that which I truly am, and use my words to heal people.

Which answers “Why that experience, specifically?”

It also answers “Why Rafael?” (because he’s a healer), and why I am continually being pushed to speak my heart (because that’s how I heal others).

Aaaahhh… a good question answered. Feels nice.

Now to go feed my waking baby and get my day underway.

(ps. What I found so silly about my childhood definition… What’s beyond physics? Nothing, it’s our understanding of physics that’s limited. And what could happen without “God” –or whatever word you like to use to describe divinity– making it happen? Well, nothing. )